. I'm all misty-eyed. That was so sweet, but more -- comfortable -- between the two brothers, even with the tad of irritation/worry that Don is feeling.
"It’s just -- the world I grew up in had a lot more magic in it. I wish you could have believed it for awhile.”
and
Don had wanted him to believe in gnomes in the back yard but never let him forget that there was a whole world past the fence.
Those are just beautiful, and describes it in a nutshell. Absolutely lovely; this one is already saved on my HD. Thank you.
And now, may I point out a couple of beta things?
Charlie first figured out the equation out when he was nine. Either use of 'out' is correct, but you don't need both.
'Basket ball' is one word. (You have it as one in several places, but as two in several other places.)
margin of error , - that sneaky space slipped in before the comma.
(And if I've overstepped, let me know. I can point out the minor glitches privately, or not at all, if you prefer.) .
Awww...
I'm all misty-eyed. That was so sweet, but more -- comfortable -- between the two brothers, even with the tad of irritation/worry that Don is feeling.
"It’s just -- the world I grew up in had a lot more magic in it. I wish you could have believed it for awhile.”
and
Don had wanted him to believe in gnomes in the back yard but never let him forget that there was a whole world past the fence.
Those are just beautiful, and describes it in a nutshell. Absolutely lovely; this one is already saved on my HD. Thank you.
And now, may I point out a couple of beta things?
Charlie first figured out the equation out when he was nine. Either use of 'out' is correct, but you don't need both.
'Basket ball' is one word. (You have it as one in several places, but as two in several other places.)
margin of error , - that sneaky space slipped in before the comma.
(And if I've overstepped, let me know. I can point out the minor glitches privately, or not at all, if you prefer.)
.